September 9, 2011

Belly Woes

I want my body back! As of my last appointment, I have surpassed the most amount of weight I have ever gained with a baby, and I still have a month to go!

It must be quite bulbous, because the kids constantly remind me of how fat I have become. "Mom, your belly is HUGE!" The other day Jude had to draw a picture of our family for show-and-tell, and there was my stick figure with a huge circle in the middle. He pointed to it proudly and said, "Mom look, it's your whale." My whale?

Of course, I have been using it as an excuse, too. "Can someone please pick this up?"

"Why?" they ask.

I point at my stomach and say, "Because I'm fat!"

Today, Jovie asked me for a piece of paper. I told her she could go ahead and get one, and her response was, "I can't. I'm too fat." Hmmmm....maybe I should stop saying these things before my 3 year old daughter acquires an eating disorder.

The most embarrassing thing that happened to me because of my protruding belly, was when I went to the bank the other day. The bank parking lot is rather small and the spaces are very close together. I parked and opened my door, which touched the car next to me. I started to get out, but quickly realized I wasn't going to fit. I stopped and thought about my options. I decided I would climb back in and go out the passenger side door, hoping there was more room on that side.

I tried to get back in, but couldn't. I was seriously stuck. I started to sweat. There were people all around and there I was stuck in my car door, too embarrassed to ask for help. After helpless thoughts of me spending the rest of my babies gestation stuck in my car door, I finally decided to just push through, no matter how bad it hurt......It hurt, but I was free! How sad.

Lesson 130: being too fat for the bank parking lot = white trash
Thankfully, I don't have much longer to go. I'm just a little nervous of how much bigger I can potentionally get! Is the next step having to be lifted out of the top of my house by a crane? We'll see!